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Budweiser: You're a man who knows what he likes and is going to stick with it, even if it's fattening and cheap. You're an 18-year-old girl who thinks you look cool because you're consuming calories while you get schlammered. 

Bud light: You're a man who can't handle a Bud-heavy or you're underage and don't know what else there is to drink. You're a girl who doesn't try other types of beer and is unaware that beer doesn't have to taste bad.

Coors light: You're in a fraternity and drink Coors because everyone else does, too. The silver label matches your new polo and looks great with a fratastic pair of shoes.

Corona: You're a huge loser for ordering a beach beer in a bar. The only way you can get by with this order is if you're really from the islands.

Jack and Coke: You've had a rough day and are looking to get drunk fast. Guys who drink it can gain a little respect, girls however, just look silly.

Bacardi and diet: You're a girl who's too strict on her diet and has seen too many of those commercials that say 0 calories in a Bacardi and diet. Get over yourself and have fun.

Malibu and coke: You think you're getting wasted when it's really just the sugar giving you heartburn. I don't get the craze with this order; doesn't everyone know there's .05% of alcohol in Malibu?

Crown and water: You know what you like and it's a good, stiff drink. You're a man's man and you know how business works.

Vodka dirty martini: You're strong enough to handle vodka, but you stick to mainstream tastes. You know what you like and you're not afraid to order it.

Cosmopolitan: You've seen way too many episodes of Sex and the City. You swear by this drink although its taste isn't your favorite, you feel pretty carrying it.

Margarita: You're tacky and probably should've just ordered yourself a Corona. A tequila slushie should only be enjoyed with salty chips, not peanuts or cigarettes.

Bloody Mary: You're wearing a broken watch because these are only to be enjoyed over brunch. While you have great taste in cocktails, your timing is all wrong.

These observations are to be taken with a grain of salt, a wedge of lime and a tequila shot. As a bartender, I do share the occasional chuckle with my coworkers at certain drinks we make.

Everyone has different tastes and when it comes to drinking, a bartender will respect anyone who knows what they like. I personally enjoy a Newcastle, Sapphire tonic, or a Stoli Sprite.